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What happy couples do before sleeping

August 09, 2017

The madness of daily life, the concern for children, the unpaid bills, the constant stress - it is not surprising that many couples fail to find quality time. So while you have the possibility of being together and alone, it is highly appreciated. This is what psychologists recommend, in order to maintain emotional closeness with your partner.


Do not forget to say again that you love

Despite the worries of the day and everything that pisses you off with your partner and worries about tomorrow - do not forget to remind your partner that you love him. It's important not to mutter something automatically, but to say it very seriously.


Trying to go to bed at the same time

Sometimes the couple does not see each other all day. And in the evening they go to sleep at different hours, but happy couples do not waste the opportunity to be together - for example, they brush their teeth next to each other and go to sleep. This helps to maintain warmth and closeness in the relationship.


Disconnect phones and other communications

In the modern world, we are always in contact with each other and this does not allow the couple time to talk to each other, the tenderness and physical and emotional closeness. When your spouse is fully immersed in the phone, they are not together with you in the room, but somewhere else. Many couples who come to the treatment and understand this problem, set rules such as: "After nine o'clock in the evening turn off the phones" or "phones do not get into bed." Thus they fight dependence on social networks, which produce dopamine (responsible for desires and motivation), but suppress oxytocin, which is related to emotional closeness.


Ensure a good night sleep

Compared to the advice to kiss each other before sleeping, to love or say to your partner how much you love him, the recommendation to sleep well does not sound too romantic, but quality sleep is important for mental health and general well-being, it allows you to be more emotionally free the next day. If there are sleep problems and you can not solve them by yourself, talk to an expert to help you develop a healthy schedule.



Do not forget to be grateful

Gratitude improves your mood and perception, so why not do it together. Tell each other before bedtime about what you think of your spouse today. Maybe it's his or her qualities that you appreciate, or happy events, or maybe something else. So you can end the day in a positive tone.


Do not try to resolve issues

Happy couples do not try to solve all problems before sleeping. To have serious conversations about issues you have disagreements with when you are both tired, and to try and keep your feelings intact, is not a really good idea. Many couples make a mistake when they start arguing before sleep. It is best to take advantage of this time while you move towards each other and do not move away from each other.


You find time to talk about emotions

Happy couples regularly talk about everything that makes them stressful and gives each other a chance to talk about it. That does not mean that you have to spend the whole evening discussing bad things, but it's best to leave 15-30 minutes to share concerns and support your partner. This way you will show to your spouse that you care about that part of their life that is not related directly to you. You have to listen to what worries them and not immediately look for a solution to the problem. In most cases, people admit to being able to voice their problems. The feeling of being understood and supported by you gives them strength, which helps to deal with the stress up ahead in the next day.


Do not put children into your bedroom

The bedroom must be your own private territory, accessible only to you. Sometimes the children want to enter the parent's bed when they are ill or have a bad dream, but in most cases, it is not worth letting them sleep there on a regular basis. The couple needs personal space and boundaries to maintain closeness.

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